


What Could’ve Been

by literatureandlemonade



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, I’m so sorry, Please Don't Hate Me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-09 05:12:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15260139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literatureandlemonade/pseuds/literatureandlemonade
Summary: Melinda May has lots of things that she wishes she had done different, the biggest one was telling Phil Coulson that she loved him sooner.





	What Could’ve Been

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y’all I’m so excited to share my second piece of these two with you! Please don’t hate me ahahah it was so tough to do this to my babies! Thank you so much for reading!

The first funeral was bad enough for Melinda May. She remembers that day well, the tears she shed... the words that were left unsaid. So when she received a call from Fury it was almost too good to be true. Phil, her best friend, her partner, her love, was back. She made a promise to herself that she wouldn’t screw this up, the universe had been kind enough to give her another chance and she sure as hell was taking it.  
So there she stood by his side, like always. She had tried to tell him during the Hydra attack but all that could come out of her mouth was “you mean a lot to me”. She hated this feeling, being so vulnerable, so scared of rejection. It reminded her of why she only dated civilians as she had once told Phil, it was simpler. After that whole mess was over, a new disaster began. Phil started exhibiting signs of needing to be put down. She had no idea why she had said yes to that, she could never shoot Phil, even when he really made her mad. She tried to convey her love through actions this time, by giving him an escape for her and him to live the rest of his days together. It hurt when he refused, but she completely understood. Imagine her excitement when he was finally cleared... even if it took a few Kree encounters and a trip to an alien city to do so.  
Then Andrew came back into the equation. Of course she went back to him, he was easy, he was predictable, she knew that he loved her back. It did sting however to see Phil with Rosalind, and it hurt even more to see how hurt he was when she was murdered. She was really thrown for a loop when Andrew turned out to be Lash. One of the only people that she had trusted and loved was gone from her life.  
Little did she know that this would be one of the least confusing parts of her life. That she would see ghosts, then die, and during that death see Phil. She still can’t believe she told him that. And then everything goes hazy... stupid robot. Something definitely happened between Phil and her, and they drank the bottle of Haig. If she had time she would’ve gone and kicked his ass for that. But of course they didn’t, after everything was finally normal for a minute (as normal as a life with S.H.I.E.L.D. can be) they took an unexpected trip in time. This dystopian society, not to mention Phil’s deal with Ghost Rider, made her wonder how much time she has left to tell him. So she finally did, not the way she wanted to... in the heat of the moment and in anger, but she did it. He didn’t respond for weeks, until he finally did... and everything was okay. Next thing she knew they were in Tahiti, it wasn’t as magical as Phil said but it was pretty damn good. She got to say her goodbyes to him and tell him how much she loved him, something she would be thankful for forever. Then, he died again. So many words were left unspoken, so many things that she didn’t get to experience with him. She returned back to S.H.I.E.L.D which slowly rebuilt itself, but it no longer felt like S.H.I.E.L.D without Coulson. She spent so many nights sobbing with Daisy and just reflecting. She knew one thing for certain: if she could ever do it over, she would’ve told him that she loved him when she first started to. Now she looks up at the stars, wondering when she would join him and be completed again.


End file.
